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Sex Within Marriage

Hot and Monogamous, just as God intended

HonorBondageI’ve been getting a lot of requests for information on bondage play.  Sadly, this is probably in partially due to the whole 50 Shades of Grey phenomenon, but there are some couples who are genuinely interested, without that influence.

So, I thought I would write a (very) quick post as a sort of simple way for spouses to start off with bondage.  Sort of bondage without bondage, if you will.

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When Did God Stop Allowing Multiple Wives?

I received a question this week in my inbox.  Actually, they asked a few questions over multiple emails.  I answered the ones I could and deferred this one for a post, because I felt it was fairly involved and I hadn’t yet tackled it on the blog in any great depth.  Here’s an excerpt of their emails (with their permission):

Why is it that the men of the old testament including the heroes of the Christian faith -Abraham, Jacob, Gideon, David, Solomon etc etc all could have multiple wives, concubines, sex slaves of the beautiful captives (Deuteronomy) and with some of these guys they with their wives permission could have sex with others. (Abraham and Jacob.) God even tells David he would have given him more wives if he asked … It is so confusing to us this big change in the bible. Is not Jesus the same yesterday today and forever?
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Porn Can Cause DepressionI received this question from our Have A Question page a few days ago:

My husband used to be addicted to watching pornography, for over a decade. It was a struggle in our marriage for a long time, but he has successfully overcome the addiction. He has been porn-free for over a year. I thought all our problems would be solved once he achieved this. Unfortunately, new problems have arisen. My husband is rarely interested in having sex, even though I am interested in it several times per week, if not daily. And when we try to have sex, often times he cannot get–or stay–erect. He will often go soft while still inside me. This is devastating to me, to say the least. Is this just a lasting side-effect of his former addiction? Am I being naive in trusting that he has completely abstained from watching porn? Or is there more going on? FYI my husband is 35 years old and has had his testosterone levels checked (they were slightly low but not abnormally, according to his doctor). Please help me.

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AmIBeautifulI think one of the biggest questions women have revolve around the question of beauty.  There seems to be this innate need to be found beautiful, to know that you are captivating.  Open up Google and type “Does my husband”, and the first suggestion is “… find me attractive?”  That’s a topic I’ve written about before, we even did a survey on it.

But, I’m going to touch on it again, because I was reminded of this question a few times this week.  One of them was in a comment from a reader who asked this:

I’m not sure if this topic has been covered, but a lot of women are very shy when it comes to sex and the naked body. So maybe a post to help the husband make the wives more comfortable and come out her shell.

Now, I don’t think it’s the husband’s job to make their wife come of her shell, but I was curious how much it did affect their sex life.  So, I took another look at the results of our latest survey and found a couple of stats that you may find interesting. Continue reading

A couple of weeks ago, we ran our survey titled Survey on Christians and the prevalence of home videos and pictures of the naked variety.  I know, catchy title, eh?  I guess I wasn’t feeling very creative that day.

It was based on some questions I had received since we’ve been talking about porn so much recently, like this one:

My wife an I don’t watch porn, as I would rather look at her than any other woman, especially one on a TV screen. However, we have video taped ourselves having sex, and do enjoy watching the tapes together before and during sex.

Note: we are very discreet regarding protection of the videos, as there are kids in the house!

I wonder if others do this, and what the range of opinions might be.

And other people were wondering if Christian couples made their own erotic material to consume, instead of partaking in what the world had to offer.  So, this survey was intended to answer the question “Do Christians make sex tapes?”

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AreYouReadyForMothersDayThose of you who have been reading this blog for a while know that the most dangerous day of the year for marriages is sneaking up fast.  That’s right, Mother’s Day.  So, this year I thought I’d give you fair warning.  Give you a chance to prepare, so that you aren’t caught unawares.  And, it just so happens that I’ve even got a gift suggestion.  It’s a pretty awesome one actually.  While I know someone out there will have a wife who will hate it, I think most of them would absolutely melt at this. Continue reading

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