Last week we did our analysis of our Orgasm Difficulties Survey and I had promised a post on each of the categories of difficulty. So, today we’re going to tackle Premature Ejaculation, also known as early ejaculation, rapid ejaculation, rapid climax, premature climax and ejaculation praecox.
Premature ejaculation has been defined as “ejaculation which always or nearly always occurs prior to or within about one minute” of starting intercourse, though the international standard lists 15 seconds. I’ve seen other definitions place the cutoff at 2 minutes. In short, there is no black and white “this is, and this isn’t” for premature ejaculation. Continue reading
This question came through on a survey comment, and I’m finally getting around to addressing it.
I am a heterosexual married woman, and never been with anyone besides my husband. However, the sight of bare female breasts turns me on. I don’t seek it out through porn, but if I happen to watch a movie. Do other Christian women experience this? My husband is well aware of this, and he is not worried. Just wondered if other women experience this.
Luckily, there is actually a fair bit of research in the field of human sexuality to explain this, so I don’t have to guess.
This question again came from a coaching client, and I thought it was so appropriate in light of the whole 50 Shades of Grey discussion going on in the marriage field these days, that I would write a post with my response.
So, is there a right way? Is all fantasy wrong? Is role playing okay for Christian marriages?
I see a trend in marriages these days. A lot of people complaining, lamenting, asking, wondering, why their spouses don’t provide for their needs in their marriage. Sometimes they’re simple things, like hugs, kisses, or just time together alone. Sometimes they’re bigger things like security, commitment, sex, or orgasms. I’ve noticed a pattern in a lot of them though (not all, but enough to write a post about). When I ask “what does your spouse say when you ask?” the answer is often “… well … I haven’t asked, exactly.”
So, today one of my coaching clients (she gave permission to quote her), when talking about this said:
So, Coach….let ‘er rip! Show me a better way.
But, I think a lot of marriages could be helped by this one, so you all get to benefit from her question.
Sometimes sex just doesn’t quite go the way you were hoping it would. Orgasm difficulties can include premature ejaculation, delayed ejaculation, erectile dysfunction, and anorgasmia. I was curious about how often these challenges occur. We see numbers about erectile dysfunction (ED) all over TV while companies are promotion drugs like Viagra, Cialis, and the like, but the rest don’t really get talked about much. Also, I wanted to know how people deal with these challenges. Do they all take drugs for ED as the commercials would have us do? Do they find other creative ways to deal with difficulties, or do they sidestep the issue? Continue reading
This survey is designed to explore a few stats about orgasm difficulties and will likely serve as a jumping point for future surveys on individual types of orgasm difficulties. And, since I know that many of you who don’t have orgasm difficulties won’t bother filling it out, I’m offering an incentive to ensure we get some more realistic numbers.
I received 2 copies of Pulling Back the Shades that I’m going to give out to two survey respondents. So, if you want them, you’re going to have to provide an email address. If you don’t want to give our your email address, I understand. You can check out my book review if you like and buy it from Amazon. Continue reading