At weddings, I have been known to stand up and give an analogy of marriage as a three legged stool.
The three legs of a marriage (in my short talk) are:
- Spiritual Intimacy
- Emotional Intimacy
- Physical Intimacy
You need all three in order to have a stable marriage. This is not to say you can’t have a marriage without all three. With only two of them, you can stay upright, but you’ll constantly be doing a balancing act (a bad situation), or catch yourself holding on to something external to your marriage (a worse situation). With one, you don’t have much of a chance at all.
Not only do you need all three, but the legs should be around the same height. All exactly the same is ideal, but some variance might not be noticed. Large inequalities start to get uncomfortable. When your physical intimacy is far above your emotional intimacy, something feels wrong, you fight to stay on the stool because it’s not level. Continue reading