Monthly Archives: February 2012
For the first 8 or so years of my marriage, a constant argument, struggle, fight, discussion, whatever you want to call it, was the frequency of sex. This seems to be a common theme with many couples. At least the ones who are willing to talk about it. In fact, I’m not sure I’ve talked to another couple where it isn’t an issue.
Now, I’m not going to get into why it was an issue, that’s a discussion for another post, and another time. In this post, I want to discuss the issue of the struggle. Why is it a struggle? How do you resolve the struggle?
In the majority of cases, the actual sexual frequency doesn’t matter that much. You hear the same arguments whether the couple of having sex daily, weekly, monthly, or not at all. At different points in our marriage, we’ve been in each of those categories. Note: The accepted definition of a “sexless” marriage is having sex less than 10 times a year (nearly monthly).
So, if the frequency isn’t the real issue when arguing about sexual frequency, what is? Continue reading