So, here I am, a Christian, launching a blog, about sex. What am I thinking?
I’ve been a Christian my entire life, and I have come to realize that the Christian culture is not only not doing a good job of teaching about sex, we are doing a horrible job at teaching about sex within marriage. We spend so much time telling people “No sex until your married” that we forget to tell them “after that, you’re good to go”. Often it’s taught “Sex is bad” and leave off the “unless your married, then it can be absolutely amazing”. We absolutely fail at teaching anything about sex within marriage.
And this is not including all the garbage we see on the TV, in movies, books, magazines, radio, podcasts, YouTube, etc., etc., etc..
I’ve spent the last few years studying marriage, Christian relationships and sex. I’ve read a lot of amazing books, I’ve found many great websites and some podcasts on sex within marriage from a Christian perspective. And lastly, I have some things I’ve learned on my own, within my marriage, that I’m more than willing to share.
My marriage is solid, but it wasn’t always that way. When we got married, we were left on our own when it comes to sex. We had no sex talks, beyond the clinical classroom education. We had little relationship advice given, and what was given was often bad. We had no idea some of the baggage we were bringing just growing up as normal people living in a fallen world. This upbringing caused a rift in our marriage for the first 8 years. Our emotional intimacy and spiritual intimacy suffered because our physical intimacy was near nonexistent. I think we had sex less than 12 times a year for our first 8 years, unless we were trying to conceive. During one pregnancy, we went 9 months without any sexual contact at all. The sad thing was: we thought this was normal. Between media and the lack of communication surrounding sex in our Christian upbringing, we assumed everyone else had the same issues.
As I get the hang of this blogging about sex thing, I’ll probably just start by linking to material I know is good. Books, other blogs, forums, podcasts, etc.. Places I know that are safe, sex-positive (within marriage), and for the most part, written by Christians. There may be some information I find that is not explicitly Christian, but isn’t immoral either.
Because sex within marriage doesn’t exist in a bubble, we’ll be exploring physical intimacy, emotional intimacy and spiritual intimacy, and how these all affect your relationship as a whole as they are all linked together.
I hope if you visit us, you’ll help out by sending me website you’ve found as well, or send in an article you’ve written, or suggest a podcast, or a book.
Together, we can add to the few resources that are our there for Christians struggling in their marriage.